Us is one of the dumbest movies I’ve seen this year. It reads like an unpolished, unfinished draft that they rushed to production without taking the time to consider whether anything they were filming made any sense.
Here’s every question that went through my head when watching this uneven, uninspired cash grab.
Note: Tons of spoilers. Seriously, I’m spoiling the whole movie.
To help with the article, the main characters in the movie are:
Adelaide – the Mom
Gabe – the Dad
Zora – the Daughter
Jason – the Son
Tethers – the name of the evil twins
Ready? Here we go:
- Why does Adelaide even go back to the cottage in the first place if she knows her Tether lives right underneath?
- Why did she have a bad feeling this time and not one of the several other dozen times they stayed at the cottage?
- Why did Adelaide know the Tethers were going to attack now? She basically says as much to Gabe when she insists they leave. Also, when the Tethers do attack, Adelaide knows exactly what they are so why doesn’t she immediately say “they are our evil twins, we have to get the fuck out of here”
- When Adelaide is on the beach talking to Kitty, she says she’s “bad at talking” (note – I’m not making this up). How did she ever make friends if this was the case? Has she always been bad at talking? Why is she bad at talking? Did she just hate Kitty?
- Gabe says they hadn’t been back to the cottage since Grandma died, implying they’d been here many times before – was this Adelaide’s first time on the beach? But why?
- Had Gabe seriously never suggested going to this beach before? Ever?
- How did the Tethers know Adelaide was going to be at the cottage at that exact time. It’s implied they’re joined, but that raises even more problems.
- What do the Tethers do when their twin drives? Do they run through the hallways at 60 miles an hour?
- What if your Tether is in the countryside, where there are no tunnels? Does that imply only people in the city have Tethers?
- It’s shown that the Tethers do everything the main person does. How does that explain Jason and Zora? Even assuming evil Adelaide and evil Gabe had sex at the exact same time, why would evil Adelaide give birth to the same identical twin Jason and Zoras? That’s not how biology works?
- During the attack, why do some of the Tethers form a hands across
america, while others try to kill their counterparts?
- Where did the Tethers all get scissors from? Does Amazon deliver to secret underground lairs?
- Same question – identical red jumpsuits. Are some of the Tethers clothiers?
- Same question – rabbits. Who feeds and cares for the rabbits?
- Why are Jason and his Tethers completely mirrored, while the Tethers twins have autonomy?
- Tether Adelaide says they were all created because someone found out the process to duplicate people, but without a soul – but then why are evil Jason and evil Zora evil? They were born naturally, like normal babies. Presumably?
- What if good Adelaide didn’t breast feed? That would mean Tether Adelaide couldn’t breast feed? That would mean evil Jason and evil Zora would have died because otherwise they’d have to have been raised on rabbits? I am pretty confident a newborn cannot consume raw rabbit and live.
- You seriously can’t live on nothing but rabbits. There’s actually an entire term for this, it’s called rabbit starvation. It’s literally the only animal where eating it has a type of starvation named after it.
- What do the Tethers do when their counterparts get on a plane and go to Europe?
- What happens if you live in New York and have a Tether underneath you and then you move to Australia, forever? Does your evil twin just sit there and be like “welp, shit.”
- Presumably if you are murdered, your Tethers are mimicking the murder right below you? What do they do with the corpses?
- How does health care work? What if you’re a person with diabetes? Would your Tether have diabetes? Where would they get their medicine?
- On the stupid ending: So original Adelaide was strangled and evil Adelaide switched places with her. Why did’t original Adelaide just leave? Seriously, why did she stay underneath the tunnels? No one was holding her back? She could have left at any time, found her way outside and been like “hey parents, it’s me. Original Adelaide. I’m back. That other one is a doppelganger.”
- Why didn’t any of the Tethers ever leave? Literally nothing was preventing them from leaving the sewers.
- How did evil Adelaide coordinate the timing of the attack? With 6 million Tethers?We are shown that the only technology in the underground caverns was chalkboards and rabbits?